Page 1
────────── ✦ ──────────
I am a good person.
I care deeply for my family.
But the reality is I have lost so much;
our houses, our money, my sense of stability.
I’ve struggled to keep work, failed in business,
and couldn’t hold onto the Brassie Island job.
You stepped outside our marriage once,
and I almost lost you too.
I’ve been weighed down, discouraged,
and there were moments when dark thoughts tried to convince me
that giving up would end the pain.
But I’m still here, still fighting.
I nearly messed up the recent catering function
when the client refused to pay.
Sometimes I wonder if all of this is a curse,
because it feels like too much for one man to carry.
────────── ✦ ──────────
Page 2
────────── ✦ ──────────
And I know it’s been unfair to you.
When you thought of leaving for a better life,
I held on out of fear; not control, not pride,
just fear of losing the one person who made me feel whole.
The truth is, right now I feel like I have little to offer
except my love for you and for Cahjae.
Janelle, you are a beautiful person despite your own missteps.
Your heart is in a good place;
you protect our son, and you protect yourself.
You see through people.
Maybe that’s how you saw that I was holding you back.
I’m sorry for stopping you.
Maybe you would have been happier;
though deep down, I don’t believe he was the right man for you.
Please, Janelle, choose someone who loves you unconditionally,
who respects every part of you and our son.
It’s not too late for you.
────────── ✦ ──────────
Page 3
────────── ✦ ──────────
As for me, I need to find myself again.
I thank you for trying, but I don’t know
if this path we’re on is the right one anymore.
I feel inadequate in more ways than one.
Time feels short, and as you say,
you’re not getting any younger.
If I truly love you, I must learn to loosen my grip.
The reality is I can’t provide the way I want to; not yet.
You have opportunities.
There are men who would be grateful to have you.
When you’re ready, choose wisely.
And I will try to understand.
You deserve better.
────────── ✦ ──────────
